Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Hot MILF Action for You!!!

Update: I have just been informed by an astute reader, who apparently frequents far different areas of the Web than I, that MILF might stand for something other than Militant Intolerant Liberal Feminists.

Oh, well.

Too late now.

Disclaimer: I don't hate women, but the feminazis are always waiting to be offended.
I find that inviting.

I know women are capable of many things, and many (most?) are infinitely better at almost anything than I.
However, if my house is on fire, please send the 278 pound man up the ladder to get me and let the 105 pound chick drive the truck there or something.

The fact I even need a disclaimer is a testament to the evil viciousness of MILF’s, and the fear they instill.

With apologies to my wife and mother, both of whom are way smarter than I, but are definitely not feminists.
I know this, because they actually both have a sense of humor.
Also, I would like to dedicate this to Vox Day and Dr. Mike Adams, and thank them for their humorous inspiration.
(Read: Blame those two if you don’t like this post!! It’s not my fault!! I have ADD!!! I'm durnk!! It was global warming! HOCKEYSTICK! HALIBURTON!! DEIBOLD!!!!)


Super Hot MILF Action Post!!!
Note: This post is NSFW (NOT SAFE FOR WOMYN)!!!

Feminists are a strange breed, indeed.
They oft times seem shrill, humorless, uptight, and pedantic; and to be perfectly honest, they are just downright unpleasant to be around.

These wretched souls are the Militant Intolerant Liberal Feminists, or MILF's.
(They can also be Militant Intolerant Lesbian Feminsts (again MILF's), or even Militant Intolerant Liberal Lesbian Feminsts (MILLF's).

I personally think part of the problem is a lack of humor in their lives.
Secretly, though, feministas have a great sense of humor that just needs to be drawn out of their uptight, indoctrinated, polluted, sexist little minds.

So, as a public service, here are some tools and information to help you help MILF's lighten up:

1. When a feminist asks you a question, show your concern, and at the same time, your playfully humorous side by saying, "What was that again, sweetheart?”

2. Likewise, if a MILF gets upset with you, just say, "Chill out a little bit, honey", or "Don't get your panties in a bunch, darlin".
Those little terms of endearment will go a long way to ultimately help diffuse a tense situation.

3. Or you can lighten the mood this way, and say, "You're a feminist? Well, isn't that cute!"

4. Also, to help you better assess the situation; you can ask her if she is on her menses.

Radical feminists, or MILF’s, also very often feel like useless, powerless, and insignificant shrews harboring grandiose, yet retarded, ideas.
This is because they are, generally, useless, powerless, and insignificant shrews that are harboring grandiose, yet retarded, ideas.
To make a MILF feel wanted and useful, when she finishes a particular tirade or invective, say "Yeah, that's swell babe. Now go make me a sammich".

A conversation I always wanted to hear:
Liberal: Coulter is a man, baby!!!
Conservative: Hmmmm. Well no wonder she's so smart.
Liberal: Yeeaarrrrggghhh!!!!!!

This is an oldie, but a goody:
Q: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: THAT'S NOT FUNNY!!!
Q: Oh, you heard this one before?
A: Yeeaarrrrggghhh!!!!!!

Q: Why do you think it's ok to be a misogynist?
A: Because God is a man, baby! (This is the part where you duck!)

Q: If February is Black History Month and March is Women's History
Month, what happens the rest of the year?
A: Evil Patriarchal Misogynistic Racist Discrimination and Oppression!!!
(This answer sometimes translates as "Yeeaarrrrggghhh!!!!!!" )

Q: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None! Feminism can't change anything.

I hope this information has helped you get a brief glimpse into the MILF psyche.
It is also my wish that you can use this information in your daily life for fun, profit, and to help the planet.

To be continued....